Quote 13 Jul

When you can get to that place where you know your worth,

That place will be all you need to understand who you can and cannot fall in love with.

— Svvp.
Text 11 Jul The Closed Door

I remain intrigued by all the ways that God is able to slide a blessing into the different situations that make up our lives. What is so amazing is that He warps even the things stained by this tainted world into things of beauty…

It reminds me of a dandelion. Growing up, dandelions were my way of knowing that my wishes could come true. I was told at a young age, that if I only blew on the seeds of a dandelion the words I wished on prior to my exhale would be made true. I found such beauty in knowing that the dandelion could make all my dreams realities, if I just believed.

It surprised me later on in my life, when I found out that dandelions are merely weeds that grow far too often in the grass that some of us are too lazy to care for. There was nothing special about them, and they truly were just a nuisance to nature and the growth of other plants.
I still find though, that what I had learned during my childhood, the myth that I had been taught, had an even deeper lesson behind it.

The bigger lesson is that even in a weed, one can find happiness. Even in despair, one can find hope. Even in a problem, one can find a blessing.
And it was earlier today that I had the chance to once again see this concept take the stage in my life…

As I headed out the door this morning in a rush, the only thing on my mind was getting to work on time. It is only after having locked the door behind me, and turning to unlock my car, that I realized that I had left my keys inside. No, not just my house keys, but my whole keychain with both my house keys and car keys on it. My heart sank as I realized the predicament that I was in. I was locked out of my house, with no way back in. I was locked out of my car, so I could not even get to work; and of course, my housemate had left just the day before to go back home for a month’s time. In simpler language: I was screwed. The light had not completely dimmed at the end of the tunnel though, there was always my landlord that I could call on for assistance.

After a few rings, my landlord picked up the phone and greeted me, and after explaining my problem to him, it is then that I realized that the light at the end of the tunnel was beginning to dim. My landlord was out of town, and would be for the next couple of days. Hope was beginning to lose its way now, and I felt the emotions begin to appear as my vision blurred from the tears forming in my eyes. Not wanting to become too emotional, and in trying to distract my mind from the problem at hand, I began my hour long walk to work, which mind you is only a five minute drive.

The story can be longer, but I find that that would be unnecessary, so here comes the silver lining…with a splash of necessary context first.

After having lived in my apartment with my housemate for about a month now, I have learned some of her living habits, and mainly the habits that do not necessarily coincide with mine. The cleanliness and organization that I find necessary to keep up a home, do not quite fall in line with her ways, and in fact I have seen careless ways more so than anything displayed by her. My annoyance and frustration with her tendencies, I had not a clue would lead to my miracle.

Upon arriving to work and talking with my co-workers about my problem, one of them suggested I use a method she had used when she had been in the same predicament before. See, when my co-worker was locked out of her house, she found an unlocked window to open and go through.

Jogging my memory to think back to a time I had opened a window since I moved in, I realized that there had not been one instance where I had…continuing to think, I remembered when my roommate had opened a window once before to let some fresh air in. Knowing my housemate, something told me that there was a chance that when she closed the window, she did not lock it behind her….and it is in that moment that I realized how God had designed one of the blessings he had for me this day.

Needless to say, I got a ride home from my co-worker and we were able to open the window; but I knew as soon as it happened that the simplicity of popping off the screen and sliding up the window held no comparison to the true depth of the situation.
See, all this time I had been building up resentment for my housemate due to the small things that I have seen her do that just seem careless to me. I had no idea that her “careless” ways would be the reason why I am sitting in my air-conditioned apartment, writing this post right now.

My very frustration was my blessing. My annoyance turned into my miracle. My weed became my dandelion full of hope.

God is truly amazing, to be able to create goodness in what we see to be bad, is purely genius. I thank God for always finding ways to humble me, because the Lord knows that I need it.
It is so amazing to me that I was literally able to see this famous saying in real life today:

When a door closes, God will open a window.

Blessings.

SVVp.

Quote 22 May
A mirror only let’s me reflect on the part of the book Mama told me not to judge.
— SWp
Quote 1 Feb
I’m up to my ears in unwritten words.
— J.D. Salinger, excerpt from a letter to Jean Miller (via larmoyante)
Text 21 Nov

I need to release

Like I used to

Words on a page

Like I’m used to

So caught up in life

And ways of living

Lost in confusion

a slave to this illusion

Perspiring cause I’m not who I used to be

All these new experiences, shaping me

Struggling to find content with who I am

Lies to myself and fun go hand in hand

This is not my foundation

These paper bricks only stand because of the cement base

All this is such a waste

A mocking form of release

A lie to myself that this is what it’s about

Bandwagon and soon I’ll fall out

I need to get back to what I know I know

Success on the horizon

Soon to attain my goals

No need to fall right before I soar

In the end I know where I want to be

The steps to get there need to be taken now

No need to get lost to be found

No need to fall to rise up

Let me be a better me

I don’t need a history

I don’t need a sob story or distress

I can become what I want to be

It can be done unrecklessly

Let me be who I know that I am

Let me release.

Svvp.

Quote 18 Nov
Sometimes you’re 23 and standing in the kitchen of your house making breakfast and brewing coffee and listening to music that for some reason is really getting to your heart. You’re just standing there thinking about going to work and picking up your dry cleaning. And also more exciting things like books you’re reading and trips you plan on taking and relationships that are springing into existence. Or fading from your memory, which is far less exciting. And suddenly you just don’t feel at home in your skin or in your house and you just want home but “Mom’s” probably wouldn’t feel like home anymore either. There used to be the comfort of a number in your phone and ears that listened everyday and arms that were never for anyone else. But just to calm you down when you started feeling trapped in a five-minute period where nostalgia is too much and thoughts of this person you are feel foreign. When you realize that you’ll never be this young again but this is the first time you’ve ever been this old. When you can’t remember how you got from sixteen to here and all the same feel like sixteen is just as much of a stranger to you now. The song is over. The coffee’s done. You’re going to breath in and out. You’re going to be fine in about five minutes.
— 

Unknown  (via boomsilencio)

Wow.

(via silent-in-the-trees)

As a recently turned 20 year old who lives on their own, this happens. People sometimes ask how old I am, or when a particular event happened in my life, and when I say an age, I immediately curse in my head and say, “crap, I’m 20 now. Seventeen feels like last week, eighteen was yesterday, and this morning I was nineteen. When did I get this far?”

(via curtisanthonytaylor)

(Source: kalynroseanne)

Quote 26 Sep

But the fact that some geniuses were laughed at does not imply that all who are laughed at are geniuses. They laughed at Columbus, they laughed at Fulton, they laughed at the Wright brothers. But they also laughed at Bozo the Clown.

Quote 24 Aug

It’s not a dead end if it takes you somewhere you need to go.

Quote 20 Aug
Nobody is superior, nobody is inferior, but nobody is equal either. People are simply unique, incomparable.
— Osho (via lazyyogi)

(Source: lazyyogi)

Quote 19 Aug

Neither seek nor avoid, take what comes.


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